We r teh Samurai Kittehs!

And we haz review of Teh Roommate, a “horror” moviefilm haz star of hoominz Minka Kelly, Leighton Meester and Cam Gigandet! It also haz star of kitteh CUDDLES!

CUDDLES iz a verrah brave kitteh who starred with teh hoominz and did not eat them in their sleep! Ninja Kitteh sez:

The Roommate iz abowt a hoomin girl (Kelly) who iz really too old to be in college but iz in college anyway! She iz roommates with a creepy girl (Meester) who iz really too creepy to be in college! Samurai Kittehs sez:

Teh old college girl dates a man (Gigandet) who iz verrah handsomes but who iz waaaaaayyyyy too much old to be in college! Samurai Kittehs think this be college for either really dumb peeple who repeated teh kindergartenz ten timez or that someone should call teh Chris Hansen man to watch teh pedopeeple at this skool! Samurai Kittehs sez:

There iz no point to Teh Roommate! Samurai Kittehs thought this wuz a turrible moviefilm about nuthin! It wuz not be scaired! It wuz not be thrillin! It wuz be lamespice and Samurai Kittehs are a bit upset that money wuz spent by Her to see this piece of trash! Samurai Kittehs sez:

Teh Roommate iz ackshully a verrah short moviefilm but it feels like a verrah long moviefilm becuz there be no sense of pacing! Also, teh characterz be stoopid like teh cardboard and never gives audience reason to root for them except to make teh moviefilm be over! Samurai Sword Kitteh sez:

But there wuz be kitteh CUDDLES!

CUDDLES be a kyoot kitteh teh too-old hoomin finds and keeps in her dorm! Because that iz a verrah safe and hoomane place to keep a kitteh! Daniel-San Kitteh sez:

Teh too-creepy hoomin iz left alone with CUDDLES a lot! Samurai Kittehs wuz verrah scaired for CUDDLES becuz teh too-creepy girl wuz too creepy to be trusted with teh proper care of a helpless animal! Samurai Kittehs qwotes teh lady sitting behind Her during teh moviefilm:

Samurai Kittehs worstest fearz wuz realized when teh too-creepy girl took CUDDLES to teh room of laundry! Samurai Kittehs thawt, “Nuthin good be happenin in teh room of laundry!” And u know what? NUTHIN GOOD HAPPEN IN TEH ROOM OF LAUNDRY!

Teh too-creepy girl put CUDDLES in teh dryer! Samurai Kittehs wuz so shocked! It wuz so random as nuthin in teh moviefilm lead up to it! It just happenin! Like total random event that haz no connection to anything becuz teh characters are just hollow shells who do not progress in any way! CUDDLES wuz reduced to be plot device! CUDDLES stand-in for emoshun audience not feelin for teh hoominz becuz teh hoominz r so stoopid! Samurai Master Kitteh sez:


Samurai Kittehs can deal with crappy moviefilm that iz lame, derivative attempt at horror! Samurai Kittehs can not deal with casual use of animal cruelty in moviefilm! Samurai Kittehs verrah upset that Teh Roommate used so cheap a device to engage audience emoshun! Samurai Kittehs would like to remind teh hoominz:

And also:

Samurai Kittehs peace out!