Winter Movie Preview: January 2017

There are limited releases from December expanding throughout January, including the stellar Paterson, so keep an eye out at your local cineplex for that one as it adds cities each weekend. Other than that, we’re in the albatross killing fields of early winter as studios dump their worst ideas.

January 6

A Monster Calls


Hidden Figures


Underworld: Blood Wars

“I’m finished with this…”

Us too, Kate Beckinsale. Us too.

January 13

The Bye Bye Man

January horror movies = ALWAYS bad. Although this one does star Prince Harry’s ex, Cressida Bonas.

Live By Night


Monster Trucks

Hahaha holy shit how many people lost their jobs over this?

Patriot’s Day



AKA Jamie Foxx Paycheck Movie.

January 20

The Founder

I’m not sure why Harvey Weinstein decided to dump this movie, it looks GREAT. (It did get a qualifying run in NYC/LA in December but it has NO support from Weinstein behind it.)


I don’t trust M. Night Shyamalan at all, but James McAvoy is such a great actor, and this looks like it’s pretty much just a showcase for him to do whatever the fuck he wants, so I’m in. Bonus Anya Taylor-Joy and Hayley Lu Richardson, two of the most engaging young actresses, doesn’t hurt.

xXx: The Return of Xander Cage

“I believe that like me, the people behind these robberies are extreme poly-athletes, using their skills to disrupt the international financial market. And they don’t care who gets killed in the process.”

January 27

A Dog’s Purpose

Does…does that dog want to fuck Dennis Quaid?


I mean, okay. There’s definitely worse stuff out this month.

Resident Evil: The Final Chapter

I know this is different from Underworld: Blood Wars, but…is it, though?

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