Co-dependent friendship threatened by a dude. I mean…really?
Horror movies in December are NEVER good.
Reese Witherspoon goes makeup-free in pursuit of Oscar. That shit will probably work.
Exodus: Gods & Guyliner
AKA White People B.C.
PT Anderson brings Thomas Pynchon’s novel to the big screen in a loopy adaptation that is my last must-see of the year.
Chris Rock’s latest directorial offering—in which he also stars—is about a comedian attempting a dramatic turn and giving an interview on a crucial day in his career. It caused a huge bidding war at TIFF, and it looks like Rock has leveled up as a filmmaker.
I feel like a grump saying this looks shitty, but this looks shitty.
The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
OH MY GOD ENOUGH ALREADY.
Mike Leigh’s latest stars Timothy Spall as the English painter J.M.W. Turner, in what is looking like a strong possibility for an Oscar nomination.
Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb
I’m not going to lie, I’ll probably end up watching this on Netflix just for newly-hot Dan Stevens.
Bradley Cooper gains a bunch of weight in pursuit of Oscar. That shit probably won’t work.
Tim Burton pulls his head out of the money cow’s ass just long enough to make this movie about Margaret Keane, a painter famous for creepy portraits of big-eyed children who was at the center of a legal firestorm after her husband claimed credit for her works. Starring Amy Adams and Christoph Waltz, is not a must-see but something worth checking out eventually. Keane’s story is really interesting.
Mark Whalberg loses a bunch of weight in pursuit of Oscar. That shit definitely won’t work.
Seth Rogen and James Franco re-team for a comedy about two doofuses (doofusi?) attempting to assassinate North Korea’s Kim Jong Un. Great counter-programming amidst all the Oscar bait.
Into the Woods
Jesus Christ, Johnny Depp. Jesus. Christ.
Two Days, One Night
I never particularly enjoy the films of the Dardennes Brothers, but Marion Cotillard has been earning rave reviews all year for her performance as a women struggling to convince her co-workers to prevent her from being fired so that they may receive raises. I’d rather just re-watch The Immigrant (available on Netflix Instant), but if intense, thoughtful foreign dramas are your thing, this is right up your alley.
Angelina Jolie directs a World War II epic in pursuit of Oscar. That shit will probably work.