It’s Friday! There’s fashion! It’s time for a Fashion Friday Fun Post, a totally new thing I just made up!
Captain America: The Winter Soldier premiered in LA last night, and while there wasn’t a jaw-drop moment, there were some interesting choices made, and also some awful ones, as well as Suit Problems galore. But also Suit Wins! But mostly Suit Problems. So let’s get started. I don’t have designer IDs for every outfit—if you recognize something, let me know in the comments and I’ll update.
Let’s start with Captain America himself, Beardy Chris Evans.
Beardy Chris Evans is in a great suit, looking generally great. He usually rocks pretty good style and this is a knock-out look. The suit is Gucci, it’s beautifully tailored, the blue is perfect, the vest is perfect, and I LOVE the contrasting tie/pocket square. Beardy Chris Evans is a legit stylish man. Also, if you’re going to have facial hair, this is how you do it. Fully grown-in and groomed, and NO NECKBEARD.
Next up is Scarlett Johansson. She’s in Armani Prive and if she wasn’t quite so, ahem, bounteous right now, the tit tassels would be sitting more squarely on her torso, and not on her tits. Either way, though, tassels are almost never the right decision. I don’t love the outfit, but it isn’t awful. The silhouette is very flattering, making the most of her pregnancy curves, and her hair/makeup are killer. (God, she is SO FUCKING GORGEOUS.) I also don’t love the shoes. In and of themselves, they’re fine (they’re Louboutin, which is always baseline acceptable), but they’re too matchy-matchy with the lace dress/skirt. Still. HER FACE. MY GOD, HER FACE.
Jeremy Renner: Nailed it. The tie is a boring banker tie, but the suit is neither shiny, nor all black, nor ill-fit. This is a great tailored look, and he doesn’t look like a 1960’s Vegas hit man! We are curing Renner’s Suit Problem through the power of mind bullets.
Let’s start with someone who made an actual fashion choice and move on from there. This is Stella McCartney committing a crime against Cobie Smulders, who is a tall, gorgeous woman who can wear so much more dress than this. It’s so boring and blah and I hate it and we should start a Kickstarter to raise money to buy out Stella McCartney so she will stop it with the sartorial murder (satricide?). I will give points for the pop of pink with that pretty excellent clutch, and you can bet I will be practicing that pink lip in my bathroom mirror. The pink shoes are a no-go, though. Matching lip/shoes/clutch like that is a very bridesmaid thing to do. I would’ve preferred a metallic shoe, perhaps a contrasting gold.
My developing Sebastian Stan Situation is now a full-blown Problem. I am super curious to see how Stan handles the media over the next couple weeks. I’m not sure Stan has the personality to break out a la Tom Hiddleston, but I hope he can capitalize on the moment because my Sebastian Stan Problem demands more Sebastian Stan.
He’s wearing Zegna, it’s all black, and you know how I feel about that. At least it’s tailored. Looking through past event photos, Stan seems to wear a lot of Zegna, and this designer ID was readily available—only Beardy Chris Evans, who is a spokesmodel for Gucci, had a designer ID ready to go. I’m assuming Stan has a contract with Zegna.
Emily VanCamp wore this beaded Monique Lhuillier cocktail dress, and while I appreciate she didn’t go full-gown (with a major premiere like this, you know someone is bound to overdress), but I don’t love the look. Everything is adequate, but it’s just that—merely adequate. Revenge has proven time and again that this is a woman who can wear Major Dress.
Anthony Mackie in shiny red. I don’t like it because it’s shiny. Take away the shine and it’s perfect. But Mackie has a metric ton of charisma, so he can work it, even if it does make him look like a lounge lizard.
Oh look, our over-dresser. Hayley Atwell busted out this busty Temperley gown. It’s not the worst of the cut-ou
t gown trend, and she certainly has the rack to pull it off, but it’s not great, either, and she is conspicuously overdressed. Love the red lip, though, and the bold brow. Points for good makeup.
Samuel L. Jackson looks very Samuel L. Jackson.
Agents of SHIELD
The TV show cast gets trotted to out to all these things, now. First up is Clark Gregg and his hot wife, Jennifer Grey. This is pretty much Gregg’s standard red carpet look, though this suit is less precisely tailored than I’m used to seeing on him. In fact, it doesn’t look tailored at all. Points for the hot-dad glasses, though. And points for Jennifer Grey, who is keeping her shit TIGHT. Also that’s a good dress.
I’m not sure exactly what is happening with Chloe Bennet’s Robert Rodriguez…dress? Or is it a romper? I feel like this garment is tricking me into think it’s a dress when really it’s a romper. Either way, it’s cute and she looks cute in it. It’s not quite fitting right across her bust but that might be because the inside tit-seam is taped down to prevent a wardrobe malfunction, which is causing weird flappage on the outside seam. Her clutch is stellar but her shoes are awful so the accessories are a wash. Overall, though, a solid, I’m-not-the-star-but-I-care-about-how-I-look effort.
I don’t know what Rock Manjaw over there was thinking, but when you’re approximately ten feet, three-hundred pounds of man, a shiny, crimson, double-breasted suit is pretty much everything wrong and no. I hope Big McLargehuge observed Beardy Chris Evans because he was schooling everyone on how strapping manly hunks should be dressing to fit their muscley frame. I will say that this last episode of Agents of SHIELD made me feel genuinely sympathetic toward Agent Punch Kickface for the first time ever. So there’s that.
Ming-Na Wen is fifty.
She gets it.
I am developing a tiny girlcrush on Elizabeth Henstridge. She’s just so pretty! It doesn’t hurt that I don’t hate her dress, either. It’s not 100% working—mostly because it’s not doing
anything for her figure—but she made a real fashion choice here. The dress is interesting, it’s editorial, it’s styled really well. She didn’t phone this one in (ahem, Smulders). I don’t have a designer ID, but my top three guesses would be Emilio Pucci, Prada or Roberto Cavalli.
Iain DeCaestecker looks like he really, REALLY wants to go home.